There are something you can only ever do with people you have been friends with for longer than seven years.
Demand updates with all the authority of your direct manager with intricate details of anything embarrassing to report.
Tell them the time you went mean girls on someone, have them take your case about it, and then hear them declare it a figment of your imagination.
Explain how you’ve perfected the your autograph since you’ve been six and how you lived your dream when a naive seven year old asked for your signature at someone else’s event.
Snobbishly turn up your nose at anyone anyone on Facebook not a part of your carefully selected and diligently maintained clique of extraordinary people.
Since I have only ever been a girl I cannot speak for guys, but there are more satisfying than hours of conversations with four of your most favourite people on the planet! Except, perhaps, a magic lamp that grants you a wish that you can eat all you want and not get fat.