Blackmailing Your Parents

Impossible, you say? Hasn’t a particular sports brand been saying it loudly enough? Impossible is nothing. The catch is that they have to love you. So, go ahead. Take a deep breath. Be as loveable as you can possibly be. Just be careful. I said loveable. Not creepy. Turn on your puppy-dog eyes. Flutter your eyelashes. Pout. This shit works 😛 Even for guys 😉 Then when they look ready to cook for you, especially if they are worse at cooking than you think they are, tell them what you want. You see suspicion in their eyes and you think they’re going to say no. They might. It is here you resort to blackmail.

You declare, “Give me what I want OR ELSE” Oh crap! You have nothing to blackmail them with! They live in their house, they’ve already married their girlfriend/boyfriend, and getting them fired would only be counter productive for you! What do you do? Wait. You do have something up your sleeve.

“OR ELSE just admit you love my brother more than me!”

It is so much more important to parents that they love their kids equally than it is to children. Also, studies show that more people paid the beggar who asked for $4.25 to buy a beer than the beggar who asked for just $4. Or something like that.

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